Monkey business

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Posts Tagged ‘alzheimer’s’

All laughed out?

Posted by Alta on June 24, 2010

I think so,i dont remember the last time i heard her laugh.Its close to a year,she just doesnt know how to now.A year ago she would laugh at times when she was calm,if you joked with her she would get it,or say something funny herself and laugh but thats gone now.I have been noticing for a while now but i thought maybe its just a phase,i feel otherwise now.You cant blame her though can you,what does she have to be happy about.

The son she loved most isnt with her today when she needs him most,to know he is there and he loves her,to know all her kids are with her,everything that they are today is because of everything she did for them,they are great full and in debt to her,that they love her and whatever they do they will never be able to repay for her love and for all that she is done for them.

Just one wish tonight though,just one prayer,if i could just hear my moms laughter one last time.

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Protected: sab khatam ho gaya….

Posted by Alta on August 24, 2009

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Boys dont cry :)

Posted by Alta on August 22, 2009

This post was supposed to be about her,but i guess its impossible to talk about either without mentioning the other,so now its about both of them.I know thoughts and lines might be mixed,going back and forth but i cant keep my head straight,i just hope that i am able to do a decent job of this.

I have been wanting to write about this and hope in some way to get it out of my system,at different times when i have been feeling down or i have been seeing her suffer,i have written lines in my head but never actually put them down,and its time i did,i really do need to get it out of me.I know even writing pages and pages of how i feel and what not is not going to take away the pain or the memories,or the hurt that i feel every day when i see her.How at times i stay late at work just so i dont come home when she is in one of those moods.

The one person i really feel bad for is my dad,who is there with her 24/7,he has no friends,he does nothing all day but be by her side to take care of her,not trusting anyone not even his own children to care of their mother,and to be honest we wouldnt be able to,no one can do what he does.He was a different man 6 years ago,he is clearly older,more tired,weaker,i have got to know him more then i ever knew him over the last 5 years,grown closer to him.He is not the hero or the super man that i had in my mind,my dad the risk taker business man who had nothing when he was 18 years old and by the time he was 45 he had everything and more that 18 year old would have wished for.Today i know that he would not have achieved half of it if it wasnt for my mother,she was the corner stone,the support,both of them together built everything,raised their 5 children and gave them everything they wanted,life was perfect for them.

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