Monkey business

Sab pagal hain,aur mai sab se bara nahi hoon!

The week that was

Posted by Alta on July 17, 2009

Its been a long one and still a day to go,even though i was hoping to take tomorrow off.I cant say i have worked very hard,even though its been more running around then i have done in a while and more of the same tomorrow and prob next week too.

I dont mind,have to do what i have to do and my fault really i always do this,wait for the last week or so and then have to do everything at the same time again i dont mind i like it in a strange way.

This week has sucked on more then one level,the running around,things being delayed again and again,and its been a mental drain.Options and choices,plans,dreams,work,its been a mess and all together.Funny how things just pile up or just seem to happen all at once,and the whole of last week i was sitting around with nothing to do.

I havent felt so fecked in the head in a long time,i have never been one to second guess myself,i have always done what i wanted to do without worrying about what might or will happen.Not that i would go into something blind but id do my homework and go for it 99 times out of a 100.Twice this week i didnt go for it,but i have always been lucky and things worked out in my favour (ended up doing it on somones advice)But the point is i should have been the one to say yes,then end up saying no on both ocations.

I have no patience,i flare up very easily and that doesnt help,though i have been trying to behave but at time i just cant and well what happens next is not at all nice.And as i have had these things running through my head this weeks been worse and i have lost it on more then one ocation.

Something else this week,i havent smoked for a good few months now,but have been wanting to for the last week or so,why no idea.It cant be nicotine and all that i mean should be out of my system and i havent felt like smoking or that i need to other then the first few weeks or the first month that i quit,So why now all of a sudden?

I am just down,never felt this low for some time,after a long time i am not sure and i hate that,i have always been the one to be sure and have always known what i wanted to do in life and wanted out of life,and been lucky enough to have it all.I am just not me.

I have been nice to the family though,all ha ha and all smiles so they are happy,as it is they have 10 things on thier mind and dont need me sulking and being all down.

Weekend is here,a new game in hand for my ps3,Amir Khan fight so yay!

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